When snowbirds Susan and Jim McGavin began their search for a Kawartha cottage, they yearned for a quiet place to unwind by the water’s edge and watch the summer days ooze by. So, when they snagged a waterfront property on Buckhorn Lake’s Kishgo Island in 2010, the couple couldn’t wait to take up residence along the calm narrows between their cottage and the neighbouring island.
“We fell in love with Kishgo Cottage as soon as we stepped through the door. It was exactly what we wanted,” says Susan. But despite the couple’s initial happiness, they quickly discovered the cottage’s one flaw: disruptive wakes from overzealous boaters passing through the narrows.
Do we need laws to control excessive boat wakes?
“We were thrilled, excited, and then worried,” says Susan. Because of the constant waves, “it was impossible to stay sitting on the floating dock for any length of time.” And on top of the unpleasant lounging situation, the integrity of the property itself was in jeopardy. “The island shore was eroding, even after we piled rocks gathered from the lake as a wave break,” says Jim.
They soon had a cantilevered dock constructed in order to solve the safety issues posed by the incessant waves, but the boats still raced past, taking with Susan and Jim all hope of peace and quiet.
Then, like all brilliant ideas, a solution dawned on the couple when they least expected it, in the form of their “tall, slim, and gorgeous” niece Heather.
While visiting Buckhorn Lake, Heather decided to catch some rays on the dock. To her aunt and uncle’s surprise, the boats started slowing down. The oh-so-simple reason? “They were gazing at Heather in her itsy-bitsy bikini!” says Susan.
Of course, Heather eventually had to go home, and the waves inevitably returned, but Jim and Susan had glimpsed the power of a tiny bikini and stored this knowledge in the backs of their minds. “We were on to something,” says Susan.
Is there too much noise at the lake?
It wasn’t until wintering in Florida that a potential permanent solution presented itself. “Jim noticed a ladies’ apparel store going out of business and asked the proprietor if she would sell him a mannequin, preferably one that could sit in a chair,” says Susan. “The purchase was made and the mannequin came home with us. We named her Lola.”
That next summer, Lola became a celebrity on the lake. “So many boaters slowed down to take pictures, to come on the dock for selfies or, as in many cases, to determine if she was real or not,” says Jim. One fisherman even left a note that read “I’ve fished with dummies before but this takes the cake.”
Over the years, Lola has had many outfit changes. She’s survived a midnight kidnapping attempt, and, once inadvertently frightened a painter who discovered her under a sheet—he thought he had found a dead body. Last year, Lola said “I do!” and married a male mannequin named Luca, who now joins her on the dock for the summer.
How do I stop loud, fast boats on the lake?
The McGavin’s shoreline still experiences some erosion, but not nearly as much as in the pre-Lola days. Best of all, the mannequins provide an endless source of enjoyment. “We like to laugh, we like to have fun, and we like to provide entertainment for others when they go by,” says Susan.
So, what’s next for Lola and her new husband? “We have been asked if there will be a little Lola or Luca next year,” says Susan. “I smile and say, “No hanky panky on my dock!’”
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