Many people call themselves coffee drinkers and appreciate the benefits of a beautifully brewed cup of java. But only an elite group can claim to be true coffee fanatics. They don’t just drink coffee—they define themselves by their relationship with it. Coffee is an unmatched experience to them, one of life’s greatest pleasures. Are you one of these passionate coffee fans who take their love to the next level? If the following list hits home, your need for a coffee fix might just make you a fanatic.
You’re a morning person … but only if there’s coffee
You’re lured out of bed in the early hours of the morning by the promise of that first sip of coffee. Putting the coffee on is your first blurry-eyed step to a wonderful morning and you delight in the anticipation. But until you’ve actually savoured some, you’re completely unable to function. Breakfast preparation takes a back seat, your bickering children will have to wait, and the stunning sunrise over the lake remains unappreciated. Coffee first.
You have a collection of favourite mugs
You don’t have just one special mug; you have an army of them, each with its own purpose. There’s the “sitting on the deck first thing in the morning” mug, perfect for sipping in silence while wrapped in a blanket to ward off the chill. There’s the “reading by the fireplace” mug that you reach for on rainy nights when you’re cozied up inside the cottage, lost in a good book. There’s the “I need a break” mug, the “I need cheering up” mug, and the “sharing conversation with a good friend” mug. Whatever the coffee occasion, you have a mug to match it.
You’ll take your coffee in any form
If you can’t get it straight from the pot, you’ll get your fix from coffee-flavoured goodies. You’re down for coffee ice cream, coffee cake, mocha cookies, and more exotic coffee creations like coffee-flavoured chili, java bbq sauce, and coffee-rubbed lamb chops. Do you like your coffee crisp? Yes! You’ll take it anyway you can get it.
You wear coffee-related clothing
You feel the need to express your love for coffee through kitschy clothing choices. You rock shirts that say “Keep Calm and Drink Coffee” or “Bean Counter.” You have a coffee shop style that you’ve perfected, reserved for visits to your local café. You may even consider your coffee to be an important outfit accessory. Does this sweater go with my pottery mug?
You have coffee buddies
You instantly bond with other people who make or appreciate good coffee. When a new friend brings you the perfect cappuccino at a dinner party, you’re smitten. When you watch someone at the grocery store drop a bag of your favourite beans into their cart, you have to start a conversation. Coffee is a surefire way into your inner circle.
You really meet for coffee
“Let’s meet up for coffee” isn’t just a pleasantry to you; it’s the true purpose of the outing. Your friends might want to catch up and your neighbours might be dying to spill lake gossip, but you’re more focused on the delicate balance of flavours in your cup of espresso. Idle chit-chat happens over wine, but when coffee is involved, it’s the star of the show.
You convert people
If people aren’t into coffee or don’t make the effort to drink it the right way, you’re convinced they just need an eye-opening experience. You’ll offer to brew them the perfect cup if they’ll please put down the teapot and step away. You’ll hand-grind whole beans on the spot to prove that there’s no substitute for freshly ground coffee. The cult of coffee is a glorious experience and you won’t let anyone miss out.
Coffee is your favourite scent.
No really. Nothing beats the smell of a freshly brewed cup of coffee. You linger in coffee shops just for the aroma. If your neighbour is making coffee, you’ll sit close to the window and inhale. You’d wear coffee perfume if you could! And now you’re going to investigate whether someone has invented that already.
You look at pictures of coffee online
Pictures of coffee on the internet are more appealing to you than cats playing instruments and unlikely animal friends. Sure, that poor little puppy is being raised by a pig, but did you see this cappuccino with John Lennon’s face expertly detailed in foam? Let’s see a cat do that!